Unit 1 Post-Write

In my essay I chose to have a radio show where they discuss violent lyrics and how they can affect people. The discussion takes place with people who see lyrics in very different views. There is an artist known for violent lyrics, a professor who is an expert witness in court cases involving violent lyrics, and a mother who believes violent music contributed to her son's suicide. My essay deals with several questions involving violent lyrics, the main one being, does it [violent lyrics] really contribute to violent behavior or is it simply entertainment?

Writing a dialogue has been more difficult than a traditional essay for me. With a traditional essay, I can just state the facts and maybe a few of my own opinions and then I'm done. With this dialogue I had to put other people's emotions and thoughts into words as if they were saying them. It's easy to know and express how you feel about something but to have to create someone else's reaction to something takes more creativity and time.

In my essay I chose to have two people who would have a huge disagreement on the topic. I felt a mother debating with the artist whose song lyrics were directly related to her son's death would be a great way to add disagree. When someone would agree I made sure that they didn't just agree but they added their opinion and feelings on the topic. If someone were to disagree I tried to add in questions between characters to have them try to understand why they feel that way. At one point the artist complicates things when he turns the blame onto the mother.

I didn't get a chance to get any feedback. I did sit in with three other people who had feedback given to them. I made sure to listen carefully and take all of their advice and incorporate it into my final draft. I thought about all the things that made their essays great and what they needed to work on and put that into my work to make it better.

I think one strength of my essay was that it had a lot of emotion. I believe I picked a great panel to have that discussion. I would love to hear a radio show with a similar set up.

I think my essay lacked facts and evidence. I feel I could have put some stats in there somewhere. I could have used more "real" info and less emotions and opinions.

I feel the help I need from the instructor's response would be to show how I could have had more balance on my essay. I tried not to fill it with just a bunch of stats and ended up filling it with too much emotion. I feel any help and feedback will be useful for my future writing assignments.